I have been reading many blog posts about soon-to-be-parents expecting their bundle of joy but how many of them are actually mindful of their very heavy responsibilities as parents? Not that many, I would say so I am pleased to read an article entitled:
"
Do unto others as you would have them do to you – the parenting edition."
where Kimberly who is expecting her first child realises this and shares about it. Seldom I see people with this deep insight into parenting especially the part where I have highlighted with blue text in the excerpt of her article below so I am sharing her words here with you. Please find the first portion of her post below:
[[Start of excerpt]]
I was just going to post this on FB but felt it’s a bit too long. So here we go…
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Since finding out that we’re going to become parents ourselves, I have begun to realise, more than ever, how important it is to work on my personal attitude, my perspective towards life, my views of other people and my words.
It is important because I realise that whatever I do or say will inevitably affect my children.
If I were negative, they will grow up to be negative. If I had no manners, they will grow up with no manners. If I were lazy, they will become lazy. If I had no opinions, they will become spineless. If I continued cussing, they will grow up cussing a lot. If I made life decisions without researching and studying, they too will become hasty and stupid with their decisions in life. If I lived a mediocre life, I sure as hell shouldn’t expect them to miraculously become the creme de la creme of society. If I lived a life of blaming others, they will blame me in return.
Giving birth is not noble, it doesn’t take a genius to get knocked up and push a baby out.
A child does not choose to be born, you force them into this world and thus you willingly shoulder the burden of raising them. Don’t act like you did them a favour.
And that’s why, children owe parents nothing. Not time, not service and certainly not money.
Whatever that children give to their parents when they’re old are given out of love, not because they owe the parents anything. So ask yourself, have you raised your children with love?
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[[End of excerpt]]
Please click this
link to continue reading the rest of her post.
I really hope that more parents or parents-to-be are as mindful as her.
How ever we mould our children, they will become what ever mould we want them to be. Guide, teach and lead them to the right path and they shall be what ever you have lead them to be.
ReplyDeleteIdeally yes but in the real world, there are other influences apart from parents but of course parents should set the right example.
DeleteYep, raising a kid is not easy, especially if we want the very best for them, money is one thing.. I don't like vegetables, but I still force myself to (like to) eat them in front of my kid, that's another thing, teehee..
ReplyDeleteYou are doing the right thing by setting a good example for your children.
DeleteI like that excerpt.. some parents might feel that their kids are a burden to them... to me, my babies are miracles.. wonderfully created and given to me! How not to cuddle them with adoring eyes and pride...
ReplyDeleteClaire, you did a great parenting job. Your children now are really close to you.
DeleteMany thanks for showing me this article, if you didn't highlight I would've missed it. Living in HK and trying to hold on to my "Malaysian-ness" while seeing jarring differences between cultures, I really value such reads!
ReplyDeleteYou are most welcome! :)
DeleteAs a mother and grandmother I do have a slightly different point of view. I do agree that you should set a good role model for children to observe and hopefully follow. Unfortunately or fortunately, even with your best efforts I think people are hard wired with certain personalities and will follow their own path.
ReplyDeleteAs for not owing your parents anything, I'm too Asian. With all their sacrifices and love given (if there were) I feel that you do owe them your respect, your time, care and kindness. But maybe that's just me.
Hello Kay, thank you for sharing your views here. nurture and nature both form a person's character.
DeleteAs for the owing part, yes your views are definitely very traditional Asian.
The moment we carry them in our womb, the responsibility have started. We also physically and mentally prepared the moment the little miracle arrives. I agreed we as parents play an important role as kids tend to follow and pick up from us easily.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I am wishing is my kids grow healthy and happy in their lives. They also have to learn to respect people that comes along the way.
You raised an important point that the responsibilities start when they are still in the womb so the basics are no smoking and no drinking.
Deleteinteresting piece of advice. Will remember this when I have my own child.. thank you for sharing ;)
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome. Thank you for dropping by.
DeleteOh yeah...I think I read something similar in the past and could agree more when it comes to the part that children didn't ask to be born or chose to come to this world....I'll hop over to read the rest of her article....
ReplyDeleteI think it is good that more and more people have this view so that they become more responsible parents.
DeleteHi there!
ReplyDelete*wink*
p/s: i'm an evil mom, fyi.
Hello there, glad to see you back! Are you Maleficent? :)
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