Sunday, September 13, 2009

Wo shi shei, 我是谁, who am I?

I am not going to write a review on Jackie Chan's movie entitled Wo shi shei (Who am I?)我是谁 here. This is about me.

When strangers meet me and want to get to know me, the two common questions they would ask me is what my name is and what do I do. What they really want to know from the second question is what my job is. So I will address the latter question here.

1. My job:

I have taken myself out of the job market voluntarily since August last year so I am jobless or jobfree at the moment and I do not expect to be looking for another job anytime soon until it is really necessary (read: low on fuel).

They would not ask me about my gender/sex because they can see for themselves that I am a woman. If they look at my hands, they would see that I am not wearing a wedding ring so they would think that I am not married. Well, in that case, they would be wrong. I have been married for 10 years now to a man whom I have dated since I was 20 years old. 18 years is a long time to be with someone but there are still two more years to go before:

his years with me = his years without me

After knowing all these facts, they would smile knowingly and say "Ah, so you are a housewife." Those who are politically correct would use the word "homemaker" while those trying to be smart would say "home minister" instead of "housewife". Then they would proceed to ask "how many children do you have?" to which I would replied "none".

At this stage, they would be torn between politeness and curiosity. In their heart, they would like to know why I do not have any children but they are afraid to ask because they do not know me well enough to ask personal questions such as:

a) Is it due to health reason?
- am I infertile?
- is my spouse infertile?
- what treatment have I undergone?
- what did the doctor say?
b) Is it by choice?
- If it is, why?
- whose choice - mine or my spouse?
c) am I still waiting for the right time while my biological clock is ticking away?

They are also afraid their questions may bring back sad memories of miscarriages (if there were any) so most of them would just stop at that.


  1. Ya, if you don't mind me asking, why don't you have kids? You don't want kids?

  2. zewt: Yes, I have. Just got my comments feature working. Don't know why your comments which I received earlier went missing. :( Enjoy your holidays!