Losing my wisdom

In my mind, the year 2002 will always be associated with my teeth. That year, I suffered the most painful toothache I have ever experienced in my life. It was brought on by my wisdom tooth that had only partially erupted. The eruption caused an opening in the gum which allowed bacteria to enter around the tooth in front of the wisdom tooth and caused an infection.

I have to eat antibiotics and wait for the infection to heal before removing my wisdom tooth. Luckily, the extraction of wisdom teeth was covered by the private medical health insurance plans (Bupa UK) provided by my employer. I only had to pay GBP100.

The dental surgeon I consulted with advised me to remove all 4 wisdom teeth at one go. He asked me whether I prefer to do it under local anaesthesia or general anaesthesia. I asked him which one does he prefer. He said general anaesthesia so I agreed to it.

The operation was done as a day case. I checked into the hospital and was given a single private day room. The anesthesiologist visited me before the operation and asked me if I have any concerns. I told him that the previous time I went under general anaesthesia for an appendectomy, I vomited when I woke up. I also told him about my fear of anesthesia awareness where some people wake up during the operation, paralyzed but fully aware of their surroundings. He assured me that he will give me the correct dosage of drugs to ensure that both events do not happen.

I was given a combination of inhaled anesthetic gases and intravenous drugs and I promptly blacked out. For both times I underwent general anaesthesia, I was completed "out of it" - no dreams at all. It was just black out and came to. Nothing in between. I wonder if death is like that. Just black out and no coming back. Well, I digress.

Back to the removal of my wisdom teeth. When I came to, my whole jaw was sore and painful. I then slept until the drowsiness wore off. Then I was discharged from the hospital.

The recovery took a few months. The lower part of my face around my jaw swelled up big time. There were stitches in my mouth and it was painful. It was soup and porridge for me everyday for what seemed like eternity.

Before the surgery, I asked the dental surgeon to please keep my wisdom teeth intact when he removed them and he did. You can see for yourself, here they are:



They are so big. I can't believe that the teeth were fully formed and hidden in my gums. I still have them with me today. Perhaps I should string them up and wear them around my neck in order to keep my wisdom.

Mine, Yours, Ours

In my early days of marriage, I have often wonder how other double-income married couples manage their money. After talking to a few friends, I find that anything goes as long as both parties are happy about it. Here are some of the methods:

1. Popular Method.

Have a joint account for household expenses.
Each of them holds a separate individual account for personal use.
The challenging thing here then is to decide how much each contributes to the joint account.

Does each person deposit:
a. an equal amount (e.g. each person deposits RM600 monthly) or,
b. the same percentage of his/her net income (e.g. each person deposits 30% of his/her net income monthly) or
c. as much as/as little as he/she likes
into the joint account?

Then the other question is what are the items classified under household expenses.

If the husband wants to replace the old but functioning TV with a state-of-the-art TV, can this expense be considered part of household expenses and be paid out of the joint account? If not and if the husband is unwilling to fork out money from his own personal account but yet he is forced to do so due to his desire for the new TV, does he have the right to disallow his wife from using this new TV?

If the wife likes to eat out but the husband does not but gives in to her, who pays for the expensive meal? The joint account or each pays for his/her own meal or should the wife pay for both because she is the one who wants to eat out.

These are some of the things brought up by my friends as examples of the many things to decide in this method.

2. Share and Share Alike.

In this method, there is only one joint account. Everything goes into this account and all expenses come out of this account. At a glance, this is the easiest method to manage but then it is rather difficult to control who uses how much.

3. Wife = Financial Controller.

The husband puts everything he has into a joint account whereas his wife maintains her own personal account. The wife has the final say on what expenses get paid out of the joint account. This is the method used by my maternal grandmother but I don't think this method is popular with husbands nowadays. I have not come across anyone telling me the reverse where the husband is the financial controller. Perhaps this is because I only ask the wives.

4. Each to Each's Own.

Each of them has his/her own individual personal account. No joint account at all. They then decide who will pay for what. Surprisingly a few of my married friends use this method.

So the above are the four methods that I can recall. Does anyone have any other methods to share?

The most important thing here is that both parties must be willing to be honest with each other and to discuss about each spending and saving habits. No point having separate accounts but poor financial management and then needing one's spouse to bail one out in times of financial difficulties.

A new pet for 2010

My spouse bought me a pet for the new year. I chose it myself. When it gets dirty, I will give it a bath. Here it is (isn't it cute?):

Yes, it is a bag. It is to be my always-carry-bag. I always carry only one bag for almost all occasions. The bag has to have many compartments with zip fasteners. I used my previous bag almost everyday for 10 years until the colour of the leather faded away and the stitches attaching its handles to its body slowly became undone. It was my constant companion and sturdily carried many heavy loads for me. It has even gone through 4 winters with me in UK. That bag was also given to me by my spouse who was my boyfriend then.

In loving memory of my previous bag which has served me well, here are some photos of me and the bag. Photos below (right to left): taken in 1997 when I first visited Tokyo and in 1998 when my employer sent me to Hong Kong to participate in a project meeting.

Photos above (left to right): Bag came along with me to Shanghai in 2003, look at how the colour has faded (at my coursemates graduation in 2006), please don't ask me why I contorted my body that way while hanging onto the bag for dear life at the Doi Inthanon National Park in Chiang Mai (2007).

I really have many fond memories of the bag but sad to say although I wanted to keep it for the rest of my life for its sentimental value, I only kept it for another 2 years. I had to throw it away while clearing my things at the end of last year as part of my decluttering exercise.

I hope this bag will serve me for just as long as my previous bag. It does look a bit big on me (middle photo below) but then I like my bag to be able to contain many things. It even has a removable compartment for my netbook.

There are other colour choices as well such as sweet pink or refreshing green but I chose brown for its earth tone. I have started using it on 1 Jan 2010. Let's see whether I am still using it on 1 Jan 2020.

Wishing you a happy birthday!

Happy birthday to you, dear brother! May you be healthy and wise always! Here are some photos to recap the good times we shared.


Though distance separates us now, I will always remember the day that you were born into this world. At that time, I have just entered secondary school. How time flies. Now I am much older and you have grown to be a young independent man.

May you have a wonderful celebration with your lovely wife. Enjoy your big day!

2009

Overall, 2009 has been a good year for us.

Freedom was finally gained after seeing the light one day in early 2009.

We finally made it to Japan to enjoy the Sakura season after talking about doing so for many years. Travelling at our own leisure for two weeks without having to adhere to a tour schedule was fun, fun, fun!

We finally received what was due to us 3 years ago and making full use of it.

We welcomed an addition to our extended family in Aug 2009.

We made it in time to sign the official documents in Dec 2009 and started the process.

Goodbye 2009! Hello 2010! Happy New Year everyone!

Christmas 2003

We were in Beijing on 24 and 25 Dec 2003. My spouse was there for work and I just tagged along for fun. It was our first trip to the country of our forefathers.


We stayed at the Century Golden Resources Hotel 北京世纪金源大饭店 (now known as the Empark Grand Hotel Beijing). The above photos were taken in the lobby of the hotel and its underground mall.


On Christmas eve, after my spouse have left for work, I took the local public bus to the nearest subway station (Xizhimen). Then I took the subway train to Tiananmen. I have taken subway trains in Hong Kong and Tokyo but this really takes the cake - the whole train was jammed packed with people - my whole body was stuck to everyone elses bodies around me and I couldn't move at all. It was a horrible experience.

Then I alighted at the Xi Tiananmen stop but I didn't go into 故宫 Gugong (Imperial Palace) as I wanted to wait until my spouse could go together with me. I just walked around outside and took photos. Since I was alone, many Chinese came up to me to offer me their tourguide services. I had a difficult time saying no so many times. They were really persistent.

While I was walking slowly and enjoying the scenery, daydreaming in my own world, I suddenly realised that someone was shouting at me from behind. I turned and to my horror saw that a group of people were marching behind me and their troop leader was shouting at me to move away from their path. I quickly jumped aside to let them passed. I was so embarrassed. They must be thinking, who is this stupid tourist who is blocking our way. Luckily I managed to snap out of my daydream in time or else I would have been trampled to death by the marchers.

Then with a map in my hands as my guide, I walked all the way to the main Quan Ju De 全聚德 restaurant located in Qianmen (famous for its Quanjude Peking Roast Duck) to meet my spouse and his customers for dinner. It was very, very windy and cold but not snowing. I had to struggle to walk against the force of the wind. The above photos were taken along the way. I walked through rows and rows of bare naked trees in the grey wintry weather.

This photo was taken in the lobby of the restaurant.

On Christmas day itself, my spouse had to go to work as it was not a public holiday in China. As we were leaving Beijing on that day for Shanghai, I didn't venture out of the hotel for anymore lone-sightseeing. Instead I just did some lone-shopping in the huge underground shopping mall of the hotel.

It is good that for this year, we are going to spend Christmas with our extended families. Nothing beats singing Christmas carols with all our family members around us. Here's wishing everyone a Very Merry Christmas!

庆祝冬至

After dinner, we went to my mother's place to eat glutinous rice balls (汤圆 tāngyuán) because today is the winter solstice festival (冬至 dōngzhì). My sister and mother made two types of fillings for the tang yuan, peanut paste and black sesame paste. The glutinous rice balls were served in ginger syrup. My sister also made thick spring onion pancakes with less salt (葱油饼) for me to eat because she knows that I like to eat them that way, thick and not salty. I feel so loved after eating all the delicious food my sister and mother cooked for me. A big thank you to both of them!